It's A Little Messy In Here

I am not brave enough to take a picture of my kitchen.  But if I were, you'd see vases of flowers (pretty), but a lot of un-pretty things over taking everything else.  There's dirty bowls and pots and a big pile of stems and left over dishes from last night and spilled blueberries on the floor and coffee grounds that somehow exploded and a pile for recycling.  It's so bad, it's spilling over to the dining room.

I'm having a party tomorrow.

But to get there - I have a mess today.

And I'm thinking about conflict and my husband.  Not that we're having a conflict right this minute... but when it does come up, we handle it two different ways.

I'm ok with keeping things nice and neat.  That's another way of saying, I'm OK with ignoring/being silent about it.

My husband, though... he wants to get it out in the open.  He wants to get dirty and grimy.  He wants to look at things from all angles.  In other words, he wants to talk about it (gasp!!!).

Can't we just pretend it's not there?

I have a big to-do list for tomorrows (simple?) party... and I'm having to making my big messes to get ready.  Tomorrow will be worth all this.  The celebration of friends and family.  The thankfulness of God's generosity and very unmerited favor.  The laughter.  The memories made.  The sweetness of being together.  

And so is my marriage.  Worth the talking-about-things-that-hurt-too-much...  worth the examination of my sinful habits and my damaging idols... worth the tears and the high blood pressure and the butterflies in my stomach.

I'm not talking about fighting dirty.  I'm talking about loving each other in the middle of the mess.

So, maybe I should take a picture.  Maybe two: before and after.  So I can remember in the middle of a conflict that it's going to be worth it in the end.  The celebration of two being one. The thankfulness of God's generosity and very unmerited favor.  The laughter.  The memories made.  The sweetness of being together.